![]() One (or Both of You) is Avoiding the Other But if things are otherwise good, but your relationship feels disconnected, things may be ending. If he’s going through something like stress at work or having a loved one sick or dying, cut him some slack and wait it out. He may be processing his feelings about your relationship. You’ve tried talking to him about it, but he’s shut you out. You’re having trouble connecting emotionally to your guy. But if you continue to bicker over the same topics and they’re not improving, then it might be a sign it’s time to break up. So how do you know if your arguing is normal or a sign of a bigger problem? If you’re able to resolve the issue at hand by talking it out, you’re probably okay. If, in the heat of the moment (over and over again), you wonder why you’re with this guy and loathe him, then probably you don’t need to be with him, even if you calm down later. But they scream, shout, and call each other nasty names…and then apologize and say they didn’t mean it. I know many couples who think that arguing a lot is totally fine. If you’ve felt a disconnect with him over the past few months and you can’t figure out how to reclaim the deep love you once had, it may be because the relationship has outlived its purpose. And while it’s normal for feelings to settle down from those early days of infatuation, your love for him should grow and remain steady and deep. ![]() ![]() You Don’t Feel the Same Way You just don’t love him anymore. What should you do?Īt one time, you loved this man like you’ve never loved anyone else. Here are some of the signs that it’s time to break up. There is someone out there that you can be authentic and blissfully happy with…but you’ll have to break up with this Mr. I need you to know that if you aren’t happy- at least the majority of the time- you’re in the wrong relationship. I want to say this: while yes, the man you’re with will have some things that completely get on your nerves, you shouldn’t settle. If you were married to an emotionally abusive man, you might think your boyfriend, who simply doesn’t care about you as much as you care about him, is so much better that you’re willing to accept the fact that it’s a lopsided relationship. "I no longer feel happy in our relationship and think we should break up.Editor’s note: Ready to attract love with a proven strategy? Watch this free video to learn the 7 powerful steps."I do not feel confident in our relationship succeeding going forward."."I am feeling hurt by many incidents that have occurred throughout our relationship and think it would be best to move on."."I don't think our relationship is healthy for me to continue being a part of and think we should break up."."I am having a difficult time communicating my needs to you, and think it would be best to work on myself.".People move on to new stages of growth throughout their lives, and there's no guarantee that they will always grow together. Remember that sometimes life just gets in the way of even the most well-intentioned relationship, and just because a relationship is ending does not mean that it was a failure. Instead, you may want to explore how your own actions - and the actions of your partner - contributed to the current state of affairs that necessitate breaking up. This is not the same thing as blame - in fact, trying to find some way to blame either yourself or the other person is usually both futile and destructive. "You don't listen anymore!" puts blame on the other person, whereas "I can't seem to communicate with you" takes some personal responsibility. Still, you do want to try to use many "I" statements, because "you" statements can easily come across as being accusatory. While "it's not you, it's me" may be true, it often seems like a cop-out. "In thinking about our future, I don't think we are compatible in the long run."."I don't feel right continuing a relationship that I can't see making it long term."."I am not comfortable staying together knowing that we are on two very different paths."."This relationship isn't fulfilling my needs anymore."."I don't feel the same way about you as I used to.".For example, if your partner is no longer attractive to you, you don't need to say "I think you're ugly." Instead, you can say something that preserves your partner's dignity. ![]() Remember that being honest is not an excuse to be cruel. Most of all, if you don't really know why but you just need to break up, explain that as well. If you simply grew apart, tell him/her honestly where you think your values diverged and why they aren't compatible. If it's communication, tell the person where you think it broke down and be honest about it. You probably wouldn't want your partner to lie to you, so be realistic and truthful about why you are breaking up. ![]()
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